Charlie went to a birthday party recently at a Blazers hockey game; the party favor was an actual hockey puck, which is apparently the Coolest Thing Ever when you’re a six-year-old boy. Charlie carried that puck around with him for days, showing it to everyone and telling them about the game, which he actually watched. God help us if he decides he wants to play hockey.
I told everyone about how he ate four pieces of birthday cake. That doesn’t have anything to do with this story, except that I can’t figure out how I suddenly have a kid who goes out to dinner with other people and eats a hamburger, chips, and FOUR PIECES OF CAKE. And doesn’t hurl afterward.
Anyway.
During Thanksgiving week, my nieces were here, staying with my in-laws. We went over one evening for dinner, and of course Charlie took his hockey puck because EVERYONE has to see the puck. He also picked out his own clothes because as we all know I don’t give a damn what my kids wear as long we can LEAVE THE HOUSE ALREADY.
So we show up at the in-laws and Charlie is wearing a black hoodie sweatshirt that says LOBOS across the ass, a pair of gray sweatpants with pockets, and a pair of orange basketball shorts OVER the sweatpants. He has the hockey puck in the pocket of the sweats, UNDER the shorts.
Stop and think about all of that for a moment, please.
My almost-six-year-old niece meets us at the door. Charlie says, “PAIGE! FEEL MY LEG!” and sticks out the part of his leg where the hockey puck is resting, in his pocket. Under the shorts.
Paige just stares at him, so he points at his shorts and says, “HERE! FEEL!”
Just then my sister-in-law walks in the room. You know, as my son is propositioning her daughter. “You know,” she said, “this may be Oklahoma, but they’re still first cousins.”
And then Charlie says, “Paige! I have a HOCKEY PUCK in my pants! Want to see?” And he puts his hand into the shorts (because that’s what he has to do to get to his pocket, see) and my niece stares at him like he has LOST HIS MIND.
Later, we were recounting the whole thing for my mother-in-law, and at the exact same moment, my sister-in-law and I both said, “Is that a hockey puck or are you just glad to see me?” And poor Charlie heard us and said, “It IS a hockey puck! Want to see?”
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Now that is very funny! thanks for a good laugh
By Sophie on 12.06.08 9:39 pm | Permalink
Oh, Poor Charlie.
His outfit sounds similar to something my husband would wear, if allowed.
By Stephanie on 12.06.08 10:24 pm | Permalink
Dude my husband *only* wears sweats. He has what I call *dress sweats* that he wears to work. Yep. God I hate those things.
HOWEVER, this was an extremely funny story (and visual) and I have to say that Henry and Charlie are just too damn cute to be believed in the photos from the old post!
By kim on 12.06.08 10:28 pm | Permalink
Oh. My. God. You slayed me, that was hilarious! I’ve just started reading you (okay, that sounds odd) and I’m having way too much fun. Sounds like your Thanksgiving weekend was waaaaay too much fun!
By Meg on 12.06.08 10:31 pm | Permalink
Too funny! I would have loved to have seen the look on your niece’s face! LOL
By Johna on 12.06.08 10:45 pm | Permalink
So funny Susan! Best laugh I’ve had all day, er MONTH!
By Headless Mom on 12.06.08 11:21 pm | Permalink
This made me laugh SO hard.
By Annika on 12.06.08 11:22 pm | Permalink
So cute! I try to get my four year old to dress himself but he always says he can’t, HOWEVER, he wakes me up every morning naked as a jaybird after being put to bed in jammies, so clearly he can.
By Anna on 12.07.08 1:34 am | Permalink
That happens all the time in Canada. Hilarious and adorable.
By jenB on 12.07.08 4:24 am | Permalink
He will NEVER live that down when he is an adult.
Thanks I needed a good laugh.
By Tiffany on 12.07.08 9:20 am | Permalink
Haha, excellent story!
By Camels & Chocolate on 12.07.08 11:58 am | Permalink
That’s the kind of story you’ll drag out 12 years from now, upon meeting his prom date…
By Mara on 12.07.08 12:04 pm | Permalink
I laughed out lout at this. Not LOL-ed because it’s cool to type that. I literally laughed out loud. I love it.
By A. Berkoski on 12.07.08 8:35 pm | Permalink
ha! this is a CLASSIC story. love it.
By kat on 12.08.08 2:32 am | Permalink
Sometimes I say stuff is funny even though it isn’t but this was really effing funny.
By Heather B. on 12.08.08 11:39 am | Permalink
SO funny…yeah, wait until he’s older and then pull this story out again…he’ll just die.
By bombaygirl on 12.08.08 9:59 pm | Permalink
the nhl willl be happy to count you as fans, whatever way you come into the fold! wonderful bit!
By chris on 01.09.09 1:32 pm | Permalink
That was awesome! It’s almost as though the blogging gods set the whole hockey/birthday party up just so this post - which did make me laugh out loud - could be written
By rimarama on 01.09.09 4:39 pm | Permalink
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