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life list, revisited (now with more MIGHTY)

Filed Under life list on May 4, 2010

A while back, I made a life list, because like so many other people, I was feeling inspired by Maggie’s Mighty Life List project. It’s hard not to feel inspired by Maggie, just in general, and this idea of making a list and having it transform your life — well, who doesn’t want to be part of that?

I certainly do.

photo by the amazing Karen Walrond

I made a list, but it wasn’t transforming my life. Instead, it was kind of making me feel guilty, like I was slacking off on actually living my life because I was so busy working and driving the kids hither and yon and trying to find five minutes to hang out with my husband before I fell into bed exhausted from the day. There was no time to do anything mighty.

On top of that, my list felt random, like it was just things I pulled out of thin air rather than things I really wanted to do. Which really, it was, because I was having a hard time putting my finger on what exactly it was that I really wanted to do.

So I took the list down. But I never stopped thinking about this idea, that there are things that are worth doing, and that saying those things out loud can change your life. Or really, my life. Because honestly, this is all about me.

photo by Karen Walrond; funny face by Maggie Mason

I think my dilemma was that I didn’t know what exactly I wanted to get out of the Life List — in order for it to change my life, it had to be more than just checking things off. It had to be, somehow, transformative.

After I took the list down, I had a moment of insight about why this wasn’t working for me: I needed one thing to focus on, not a list of things, one thing I could accomplish and feel good about. And then, when that one thing was done, I could go on to the next thing, and so on, until I had done a hundred cool things. Because this isn’t about getting out of doing things; it’s about finding a way to really get them done. It was the list form that was throwing me, not the project of transforming my life. That was totally doable.

I just needed to figure out how. I needed one fairly big project, something that would challenge me, make me push myself, but that would come with some sense of reward. It couldn’t be a work project, and it couldn’t involve disrupting my family in any big way.

Simple, right? Right.

In the end, the answer sort of fell into my lap: the weekend of the Memorial Marathon, my Facebook feed was full of status updates from friends here in Oklahoma City who ran some or all of the marathon, everything from the 5K fun run to the full marathon. And I thought, I could do that.

In the beginning, that was a 5K race. After all, 5 kilometers isn’t that far, right? Never mind that it’s been 20 years since I ran for anything other than a ringing telephone or an escaping toddler. I could run the Race for the Cure here in OKC in October, which gave me plenty of time to train.

And then I started to think, hey with all that time to train, why not run a half marathon next year, at the Memorial?

And now I’m thinking I will run a full marathon. Because that is something that would transform my life. Truly.

I had forgotten how much I loved running, how simultaneously calm and powerful I feel after a good run. On Friday, I ran in the rain, and it was this amazing feeling of being entirely present in the moment. I’m sticking carefully to my training schedule, because I don’t want to get hurt, but I can’t wait to run further and faster. I feel like this thing — the running, the dream of running a marathon — really has transformed my life. Finally.

Want to write your own life list? My friend Karen has some excellent advice about how to go about this, starting with the simplest step of all: “Write it down.”

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I started doing the Couch to 5K program about a month ago now, and I love it. It is slow but I love that feeling too. I never liked running. I don’t know what changed, but I like it now.
Inspired by my new love of running, and Karen’s life list, I started making one of my own. Still not finished, but working on it. The first three things are, a 5K, a 10K and a half marathon. (the though of a marathon right now scares the bejesus out of me)

Going to BlogHer last year has totally changed my life in little ways that mean so much. Because of learning about Karen, I’m enjoying photography more and writing life lists. Because of you, I’m wearing a LBD to work today with a cotton/cashmere cardigan. I wonder what will happen this year to inspire me…

I started with a 5k in October, with my final goal being a half marathon in July in Napa (If I’m going to run, there might as well be wine at the finish line!). I wrote my life list a few months ago and included some things I’d already accomplished b/c past achievements are still notable, right? Great luck with your training and have two words-Under Armour-where was that stuff years ago? It is amazing.

I’m so damn proud of you. Truly. That is all.

Oh, I love a good run in the rain. You’re so very right; it takes being “present” to a whole new level. Good luck with your training (and your list). What a fabulous first step, literal and figurative.

I recently wrote and added mine to my blog. It’s interesting to sort of have these goals out in the open, instead of filed away in my mental “someday” folder. I think that just writing them down starts the transforming process.

Good luck with the training! We’ll all be cheering you on.

I’m so proud of you, SDub!

I felt the same way about my list. It was hanging over my head like a reminder of my shortcomings instead of an inspiration to knock my own socks off. I haven’t revamped it as much as just ignored it at this point. When I see an opportunity, I’m trying to grab it instead of see how it fits into the list.

Started Week 5 this week and day one was satisfying. I think the woman in the app is trying to win my trust so when she tells me to run for 20 minutes straight on W5D3 I won’t throw my iPhone in the pond. I may have set too lofty a goal with my first 5k on 5/15, but I’m not backing down. I love how strong I feel during and after a run.

Susan says: Melanie and I have a date to run the Tulsa Race for the Cure 5K on September 25 — anyone want to join us?

Good luck Susan!!! That is an amazing goal, I hope you enjoy every minute of training!

Just do it, Susan! And please, tell us all about it. I love reading race reports!

Oh dear, I was all for joining you for a 5K in October. But a *MARATHON*?

Oh my. That’s BIG!

You go girl!

It’s hard to type this with one hand, as I am holding a Klondike Bar in the other, but I can manage this much: WOW. I’m inspired. Go, you!

(Not inspired enough to put down the ice cream, but still.)

I’ve been thinking I need to run a marathon before I’m 50. And it’s trampling up on me rapidly.

Go, Susan, go!

So thrilled for you. I’m starting to discover the joys of running and I’m shocked at how good it feels. But a marathon? Wow. Standing ovation!

Yay you!

I’ve been considering the life list concept, struggling with the same points you did. The thought process you’ve described above is something I’m going to go back and reread a few times. You’re really onto something there.

And again, yay you! Obviously I love physical goals that demonstrate what our bodies can do. They’re hugely empowering.

Good for you!

I just wish I had taken screenshots of you poking fun of everyone running in the morning during Mom 2.0 only to show how transformative this marathon training will really be! (btw, I never I did wake up to go running)

Looking forward to cheering you on and seeing your cut muscles.

i love the idea of a life list, and i, too, would probably need the focus of one item at a time. running in the rain truly is one of those experiences that draws one right back into the present. good luck with the marathon!
mary allison

Welcome to the world of running! Good for you and it sounds like you’re already enjoying it. I’ve run since the age of 12 because I wasn’t good at any other sports. I ran cross-country and track for as long as I can remember. I took time off to have 3 babies along the way but the running always came back and helped me lose the baby weight. I’ve competed in everything from 5Ks to half-marathons. Now that my kids are getting a bit older I have the time to commit to training and I am signed up for a marathon in June. I’m excited and just completed an 18 miler on Sunday. It felt amazing!

I look forward to hearing about your training. Best of luck to you!

A marathon? Wow! Fabulous!! I ran my first 5K a few weekends ago and it was something I NEVER thought I could do. Now I’m training for my second one. And thinking that someday, maybe, I could do a triathalon.

It was a huge thrill to cross that finish line and realize I accomplished something beyond what I thought I was capable of. In my 40s even.

Good luck and I can’t wait to read more updates. (And that BlogHer 5K? The one at 6:30 IN THE MORNING? Will I see you there?)

Happy running to you, Susan! I think this goal is completely awesome.

My own older sister has been running since college, but began doing marathons only after having three (beautiful, brilliant) children–she’s now almost 43, has run six full-on marathons (I think?), and intends to run at least four more. She’s my absolute hero, and so are you! Though I’m still not going to be running unless something big and toothy is chasing me, hee. ^_^ Much love,
–t’other Suse

Good for you Susan!! I started running last year to train for a half marathon for Team In Training in September 2009. I really enjoyed the training. We have a rail trail right near by and the time I spent there running last summer really became my meditation. This year I can’t say that I’m half as motivated and I’m twice as busy at work so I have a lot less time. This past Sunday I took my daughter with me to the trail. I probably didn’t get to go as fast as I would have liked but it was a wonderful time spent together.

I’m totally stunned that you’re doing this. Marathon is on my list in the form of “do something I didn’t think I was capable of.” I’m in awe of people who tackle this kind of physical challenge. Go, baby, go! I’m really excited for you.

AAAAH!!!! I am SO excited for you! I am an avid runner and always wanted/planned to run a marathon before I die. But in 1998, after running the Chicago Half-Marathon, I began to develop arthritis in both my feet (something that runs in my family, argh). I had to quit running for more than 5 years. Now, I am a runner again, but it took years and all sorts of treatment and lifestyle changes and alternative exercise (yuck) and coming back to it very, very slowly. I can run up to 20 miles a week now, usually, except when my arthritis flares up (as it has this spring). A long time ago I realized I will never be able to run a marathon; it sort of still breaks my heart.

But I will be cheering you on, because you can do it in my place. Go, Susan!!!!

awesome! i’ve put this on my list so many times, and not followed through…if i could get close to Tulsa in September i’d join you!

maybe i’ll just find a local 5k around the same time and join you in spirit…

Susan, I don’t know you and have never met you, but you never cease to inspire me. I’ve always admired your organization sense, your beauty and your all around good nature and ability to “get it all done”… And you have just put in a nutshell, all that I admire about you…(you’ve made something so confusing and unorganized seem to make perfect sense and pulled together)….

The 100 list of random items IS too confusing and daunting but to tackle ONE big, huge goal at a time, DOES seem tangable. I’ve always wanted a “list” but I realize now, like you, all I want is to do SOMETHING, and then slowly, those somethings become the list (be it backwards, but a list none the less) and a less confusing list. Linda at All and Sundry has inspired me as well and she does the same thing, one huge challange at a time.

Thank you for this, you have just changed my life for the better (the so.much.better!)as you always do.

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