I have an assignment for this post — I have been asked to “share [my] Thanksgiving plans and what dishes [I] plan to make.”  Which is a such a lovely topic, really, except for one funny thing: this year, my Thanksgiving plans don’t include any of the usual Turkey Day festivities.

Wade and I have been together since 1992; with a few exceptions, our Thanksgiving has always consisted of going to one family or the other.  One year, we flew from Seattle to Oklahoma City on Thanksgiving day, arriving just in time to sit down for dinner (and nearly pass out in our plates because we had gotten up at 3:00 am to travel).  Last year we had the Thanksgiving! Travel! Extravaganza! which included trips to St. Louis (where Henry threw up all over my brother’s basement) and Houston (where I got to hang out with family AND People from the Internet), all of which left me swearing that I was NEVER TRAVELING FOR THANKSGIVING EVER AGAIN SO HELP ME GOD.

You can guess where this is going, can’t you?

This year, Wade’s family is having a full-on family Thanksgiving, right in Oklahoma City, at my in-laws’ house, less than three miles from my own front door.  Wade’s brother and sister and their families will be here, and all the grandchildren will be together at my in-laws’ on Thanksgiving day.  But I won’t be there.

I’m not at home, of course; I flew to Chicago yesterday on a flight that took off so early it should be ILLEGAL, for three more days of making sure every single one of you knows how cook a juicy, delicious Butterball turkey for your Thanksgiving dinner.  Today  I’ll be chatting live at Gather.com (go here for details) from 12:00 to 1:00 CST, and Thursday morning, I’ll be at the Butterball Talk-Line headquarters in Naperville, answering emails and trying to talk Marty into moving closer to me.

(And lest you think I am getting out of anything, let me remind you that I have cooked both a turkey breast AND a whole turkey in the past week.)

If I were cooking this year, I would be making two things: Golden Mashed Potatoes with Chives, and my grandmother’s stuffing, which is a Carefully Guarded Family Secret and not to be shared with the Internet.  You’ll just have to come to my house for turkey some day and taste it yourself.

*The best part of traveling for work is the car service — no walking! or hauling of luggage!  Which means I can wear cute shoes to fly, which I NEVER get to do in my real life.  So thank you, Butterball, for that.

This post is one in a series sponsored by Butterball, as part of my job as a Turkey Talk-Line blogger.