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Wade has been having some trouble with his shoulder recently; it is possible that he has a torn rotator cuff, but the bottom line is that he is in a modest amount of pain and has trouble lifting the arm above his head.

He’s seeing a doctor, don’t worry. It’s all good.

Last night he came home from work and since it was ~~Friday~~ Thursday before a holiday weekend we had Fend for Yourself for dinner (here’s the fridge and good luck!). Wade made a very lovely roast beef sandwich, with organic cheddar cheese and Dijon mustard, on a nice soft wheat bread, the kind that is ALMOST white bread but not quite.

And he sliced it in half and his shoulder spasmed, to the point where he was doubled over in pain and dancing around the kitchen.

(I am not mocking the pain, for the record. I feel for him. But stay with me here.)

We put the kids to bed and I sat down to work and Wade flipped on the TV and wound up watching Ninja Warrior, which is a Japanese reality show where the contestants do a totally impossible obstacle course that only TWO contestants have ever finished or something like that. We love shows like this; in grad school, we used to watch World’s Strongest Man religiously, and cheer for Magnus Magnusson as he dragged a VW Bug with his teeth. Seriously.

Although I was working. Really.

So Wade is watching the Japanese Ninja wannabes while I make the world a better place for parents, and there’s a skinny white kid from Detroit competing, and he’s really really good. He’s doing the crazy obstacle course and pulling himself up and over a wall by his fingertips and Wade says, “You know, he really doesn’t have much upper body strength.”

And I say, “OH MY GOD YOU WERE INJURED BY A SANDWICH!”

Because seriously, it wasn’t even crusty bread. Or that really tough wheat kind with nuts and stuff. Although it did have that organic cheese …

20 Comments so far

As someone who once dislocated her thumb adjusting the underwire on her bra, I feel his pain. When inanimate objects turn against us, it can be the cruelest kind of betrayal…

Do you watch the Unbeatable Banzuke? I actually prefer it to Ninja Warrior, even though more people win at it.

*can’t stop laughing*

You would fit right in in my family. Not a lot of sympathy ’round these parts.

Perhaps it was the mustard..

That’ll teach you to buy organic!

I just found your website and had to comment on this post. This sounds like my husband and I! I read this post to my husband and his laughed then made a comment that it sounded like us! Thanks for the 4th of July laugh!

That’s so funny! And I recently posted about my five year old girly girl loving Ninja Warrior and Unbeatable Bansuke.

Guess we won’t soon see Wade as a contestant on that show, eh?

I like that “Fend for yourself” dinner idea. It’s a really good one!

Feel free to borrow the moniker my husband has for me, Florence Not-engale.

Feel better, Wade.

Too funny.

We call it “Defend For Yourself” night.

Sorry, I can’t laugh about that - my own shoulder hurts too much. I actually fainted at work because of a spasm.
I hope your husband feels better soon!

You know, organic cheddar can be quite tough.
K has hurt himself sleeping.

Dude, we watched Ninja Warrior earlier this week at a sushi restaurant with a 20-person party — it was AWESOME. Better than going to a sports bar for a Gator game, I swear.

Also, poor Wade. I can understand what he’s going through. After roaching my neck moving, I brought myself to tears several times doing things like, you know, answering the phone, or washing my hair …

You’re so mean…the poor husband. I would have been saying the exact thing. I do hope he feels better!!

What was in that Roast Beef? LOL I would have said the same thing!! LOL

I just recently found your blog. When I read this post I laughed out loud next to DH. I then had to read it to him who remarked - Wow, that sounds like us. We too watch Ninja Warrior. I personally like the contestants that never get past the first obstacle - especially the ones in funny costumes.
(BTW- When I had a bad headache awhile ago and said, “Honey, you’ll have to take care of me after my head explodes”, his response was “Oh honey, no, I’d hire someone” and then turned back to his computer - yes sympathy abounds here)

I would have been much more harsh. You are too kind.

Like a good wife or something.

But I must admit, my sons soy cheese is pretty much like old boot so if it was like that I have some sympathy. Not a lot. But like a thimble full.

I would totally watch a reality TV series about dangerous sandwich making.They could start with pbj on white and work up to honey wheat and ham. i’m thinking about the most challenging and dangerous of sandwich breads for the 2 hour live finale. And don’t get me started on the condiments!

A couple weeks ago, a Detroit Tigers player, Brad Inge, was put on the DL list for 15 days due to a muscle he strained while adjusting his son’s pillow.

God only knows what would happen should he try to make a sandwich.

I learned very early on that when injured, you should always respond “You should see the other guy.”

I guess that doesn’t work quite as well with “You should see the sandwich.”

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