entirely true, but exaggerated for comic effect
it’s going to get worse before I get better

So right after I said, oh there’s nothing going on here today? Remember that? Yeah.

All hell broke loose.

I went to the furniture store, because nothing inspires you to buy a damn sofa already like hiring an interior decorator (if only because you realize that for $60.00 an hour, you can pick out your own damn sofa). I sat on sofas, I choose fabric, I conned the VERY NICE sales associate into making me a computer mock up of said sofa with the EXACT arms and legs and fabric I want on it. I promised — nay, SWORE! — that I would send Wade back to sit on the sofa THIS VERY WEEKEND so we could order the damn thing already and get on with our lives.

I felt good. Because look at me, on death’s door, but still choosing upholstery fabric! Yay me!

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